Opal Siren

My life in dreams

My Crusade


I have not posted in a while about my dreams. Maybe it is because they have been extremely ilogical.  I am finally convinced that I may be having seizures when I sleep, which is why these dreams are happening…If right now your asking yourself what the hell is she talking about now? Is she serious?

The answer is yes!…..I am not joking and these random things do come out of my brain.

Last night, as I was sitting in my room watching a Steven Hawking special on cable TV, I started to think about a dream I had recently. I also thought about something that happened to me when I was a child. All of this made me contemplate that I kind of have an obsession on questioning religion, and its been an internal struggle of mine since I was born. I have spent years searching for the “right” religion, and feeling like I am not a very good person because I do not attend church on Sundays.

It all started when I was about ten-years-old. I was a devout sunday school attendee and I was a reader in our local church. I attended church almost every Sunday. I prayed every nigh before bed. I even made my own altar/church at home, out of boredom. I was a child, so I did not know at the time that sermons were only given by male priests. I attended an all  girls catholic school and I wanted to be a nun. Then, the day of my holy communion arrived. My grandmother was happy and proud that I had achieved this religious milestone. But, I really was too young to understand what it was that I was accepting and vowing to do. I just followed and did what everyone else was telling me to learn.  I thought it would be simple to just donate to the poor, attend church and read the bible. As I was walking in a line to take the host, my candle broke in half. I was devastated, thinking I did something wrong or that maybe I was not worthy. I was only ten! Plus I did not understand why I was taking the host.  “Am I eating God, I thought?”.

Little that I know, that the broken candle was a symbol that would hunt me for the rest of my life. Maybe it was all the years of me witnessing nuns act very unholy to some of the girls in my school, that made me get off the religious wagon and simply stopped believing partially. I kept debating and searching for the “truth“, and thinking “could this be real? Is God really out there?”

Later on, as I no longer attended church, did not read the bible and simply did not see the point, I attended a Born Again Christian church, a Catholic Church, a Baptist Church and even a Jehovah’s Witness church. Not one of them convinced me that they were the “right” religion, and that I should embark in this bible reading crusade again.

Which brings me to the creepy dream I had not long ago. I was in a strange forest-like place. It was the middle of the night and I was being interrogated about my belief in God or not. I denied my belief and was ordered to go into a bus. Not me nor the other people who were standing there, knew where we were going. Then I thought, in this dream, “Is this the bus to Hell because I denied Christ in my interrogation?” Well, I woke up upset and worried from that dream. I felt like that kid that stole a cookie from the cookie jar and knew he or she was going to get punished for it.

My internal struggle came to a peak last night, when Steven Hawkin said that it is his scientific opinion that God does not exist. Out of the numerous reasons, he mentioned the fact that the Big Bang occurred spontaneously out of nothing, and that basically all the positive energy and all the negative energy (black matter) that exists in the universe equals to zero. Therefore, there is no room for a God. I was in shock. Could it be that there is no God?

But, what about all the paranormal and weird things that happen out there, which violate all natural laws and explanations? What happens to them?

What internal energy could have caused the Big Bag? I already do not believe in creation. I do see evolution in everyday things. But what about the very existence that something was made out of nothing? Even though numbers do not lie, and all the positive energy and black matter in the universe equal zero…what about numbers that are less than zero? Maybe it just took a fraction of  “divine” energy to get things started. If black holes represent black matter where time does not exist, what made time and the black hole exist in the first place?

There are many theories out there, but not everything is Black and White. So to say “there is no God”, is too strong of a statement for me. I rather think thus far there is no evidence, but all theories are just theories until proven.

Until then, my internal battle will continue….

Happy Reading!!!

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15 before 30


Ok. So we are at 15 days before 30. I also started a grueling semester at school. Not to mention that my weird dreams are getting weirder by the minute. I have to admit, I am more peaceful now with the idea that I will not be in my 20’s any longer. Actually, I feel a little liberated. No more having to do things just to please people. No more trying to impress my parents. No more senseless jobs, just to discover if I am good at something or not. I now get to focus on a path. Possibly start new ventures and actually be a serious adult. It does feel strange that now I am in the position my mother was in a few years ago, and now she is in the position my grandmother was in a few year ago as well. So funny how the wheel turns.

But enough about me. I know you want to know what my crazy dream was about.

Well, I was dead. Yeap!  In my dream I had just died. I went to a strange place. It looked like an office building with many glass windows. I saw a lot of people there. They were all wearing white. I saw a tall gentleman come towards me, and I asked him where I was. He replied: “Where do you think you are?” I hate a question being answered with a question. I defeats the purpose of why I asked the question in the first place. Then I wondered…Well if I am dead and these are angel people, then where is God?  I saw a man coming out of what looked like a conference room. He had a white shirt and tie on. I said to myself “Is that God?” The gentleman then said, you will hear God at any time and through any medium. He could be God and he can also not be God. Then, I saw another man running towards the building with several other people. The gentleman grabbed me and we started to run. He told me that we were at war with the Devil. As I looked behind me, I saw the man with a very scary red face. But, he did have good taste in clothes. He was wearing suit. The gentleman and I kept running as others were being destroyed. I could not understand why they were being destroyed…Weren’t they celestial beings, or perhaps dead already? Why would God allow them to invade and chace us in the first place? I was confused and disoriented., until we ran into a very dark area of the building. I could not see anything in front of me or behind me. I was scared. Then…I woke up.

Not sure if this dream is about my anxieties or feelings about getting older. Perhaps the battle of the old me and new me. Perhaps that almost all things end. What is even more interesting, is that I started to read my old diary a few days ago. One of the entries stated that I had gone to a psychic years ago, and she told me that my soul was not attached to my body. WHAT!!! Someone told me this, and I just wrote it down and paid no attention to it. Could it be that my soul does wonder at night and travels to places it should not be?

I think I like my Ancient Aliens theory and Aliens are the ones messing with my brain 🙂

As always comments are welcome.

Happy Reading!!!

**Image obtained at: http://kannardfamilyonline.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/dualism.jpg

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House of Horrors


My old home was staring at me. There it was, with its white and apricot paint, glass doors, balconies, and stone floors. I grabbed the gold accent door handle, on the ornate wooden door, and walked into an empty house. I was alone. I was suddenly startled by a loud noise. Someone was breaking the kitchen glass window and trying to get into the house. I tried to get a glimpse of who was doing this, but all I saw was a tall man, dressed in all black from head to toe. I  started to run up the stairs to the second floor of the house. By the time I had entered the master bedroom and tried to shut the door, the thief had caught up with me and was attempting to push his way in to the bedroom. It was a thug of war, as I was pushing the door of the bedroom with all of my body weight. I felt my arms, legs and back, burning of pain as I was pushing the door with all my strength. The thief was too strong and the door had slightly opened. He was trying to stab me with a screw driver as I was still struggling to close the door. The thief kicked the door opened and I fell on the floor. I got up, reached into my pocket, and attempted to give the thief $50.00. It was all the money I had on me. I begged the man to take the money and leave. He was not giving in to my negotiating skills. He told me he had selected this house for more than $50.oo. Then I heard another bang. This time another thief was trying to get in through the window of the bedroom were I was begging for my life. Both thieves started to talk to each other. In a bold move, I took advantage that they were talking about how to vandalize the home, and ran as fast as I could. I ran downstairs and sprinted out of the house. I started to scream for help. The neighbor from across the street came out with a riffle. The thieves were outside at this point, trying to stop me from yelling. The neighbor pointed the riffle towards one the men’s faces. They backed off and ran away, as the sounds of sirens were invading the air.  I thought I was going to pass out. I did not know if I wanted to scream or cry of relief. My grandmother appeared with my grandfather. Grandpa just said how he felt it was time to move. They both embraced me. Then I heard music! Yes, it was like a scene of a movie and music started to play: Folk, accordion, trumpet music.  It was bizarre and as you may have guessed, I woke up.

I am starting to wonder if all the stress from starting a new semester at grad school, and maybe my anxieties about turning 30 soon, is making me have these strange dreams. In either case, they are fun to blog about.

Happy Reading!!!

***Image obtained from:  http://www.blogcdn.com/www.joystiq.com/media/2008/02/feb_18_djupdt_ayv_main99.jpg

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While there is a storm out there….My top 10 dreams


 

So hurricane Irene is approaching and it is getting very windy out there. We are bored!!! We are sitting around in our tiny apartment waiting to see how it will all turn out. We have our canned goods and our flash lights ready to go. It is the perfect kind of weather to think about which dreams I have had that still have an impact to this day. Unlike many people, I remember most of my dreams and try to make some sense of them. I think that some of them try to warn me or teach me a lesson. I also feel that dreams show what we are going through in our daily lives. Dreams are a very “real” part of my life. I often see people who have passed on in my dreams. I also try to communicate with them, but at times I only get to see them. Dreams are a way for me to still be able to have some contact with my late grandmother. Especially when there days that I simply cannot stop thinking about her.

Well, let’s get started with the countdown (In no specific order):

The Haunted Mansion. In this particular dream, I was in an old abandoned mansion. The walls of the house were grey and for the most part everything was falling apart. The house had a water fountain in the middle of a ball room. It was cold in the house and there were dark entities flying around me. I tried to run outside, but there was only chaos there as well. The mansion was located in the middle of a forest. All of the trees and the mountains were burning. The flames were destroying the animals and all that was around the mansion. I saw deer running from the flames, but most of them had half of their bodies already burned. Some of the deer just exploded into flames as they were running. The smell of death, cooked flesh, and burnt leaves was all around me. It is a dream that haunts me to this day.

 

My Great-Grandmother.  My late grandmother passed away before her mother. She was only 56 years-old. My great-grandmother was not doing very well health wise at the time of my grandmother’s death. Already in her mid 80’s,  she had lived a full life and had seen things that I wish I will be able to experience. As she grew ill from old age and diabetes, she often told family members that she spoke to my late grandmother and she knew the time was near for her to join her. I had a dream in which my grandmother came to me with my great-grandmother’s spirit before she passed away. They were both sitting on a bench in a park. My grandmother sat there just looking at me with her green eyes. I heard my grandmother tell her mother: “you see mama, you will be ale to come and visit my granddaughter”. A year later, my great-grandmother passed away. Those that were with her while she passed said,  that she often spoke of my grandmother’s spirit being there telling her that it was time for her to move on from this life.

 

The airport. I have had many dreams with planes and airports. There is one that still scares me to this day. It occurred about two years ago. I dreamed that I was with my grandmother and we were going on a flight to the Dominican Republic. I often traveled with my grandmother from the U.S. to the D.R., so there was nothing strange about this whatsoever. When my grandmother and I got to the ticket counter, the attendant took care of my grandmother’s ticket and she told my grandmother to go to the gate. My grandmother took her papers and her luggage and off she went through the gate. Then, it was my turn. She look at my paperwork and my passport and looked at me. She then said: “I am sorry but we cannot let you board at this time”. I was shocked and insisted that she let me through. I remember telling the attendant that I was going to miss my flight. She then proceeded to tell me : ” I am sorry, it is not your time yet. You cannot go through”.

 

The breakup. Unless you are a very lucky person, most of us go through breakups and heartache. I often had my fair share of these before meeting my husband. There was one instance in where I was dating someone and was not sure where the relationship was headed. I was not clear where this relationship was going and if it was going to survive at all. I was pretty upset and full of anxiety not knowing what the other person was feeling or thinking. Until one night I had a dream in which I was preparing to go on a cruise. I was going to the Caribbean with my boyfriend and some friends. We all met at the pier waiting for the cruise ship to arrive. Suddenly, I noticed that I had left my pocketbook in the car. I ran to go get my pocketbook and when I got back to the pier, I saw the cruise ship leave with everyone in it, leaving me behind. I stood on the pier all alone. Soon after that dream, the person I was dating at the time and I broke up. The dream was a warning of what was to come out of this relationship.

 

The Golden Gate.  This one is a bit strange. In this dream I was being led by my grandmother into a strange room. The room was quite small and it resembled a jail house. It had guards that looked like police officers. It also had a cell with golden bars. I was asked by one of the guards to sit and wait. I remember feeling confused as to why I was there, and did not understand why my grandmother would be at a jail house. My grandmother entered the jail cell with the golden bars. I looked from where I was sitting as she started to talk to some of the people who were in the cell. Long and behold, the people she was talking to were other relatives of mine that were deceased. They all looked at me and smiled and were so happy to see me. They looked peaceful, although it seemed as they were in a jail cell. I now know why I was not allowed to enter the cell and interact with them, but it was so comforting to see my relatives. Some had passed under very stressful and traumatic circumstances. I am happy that they are all blissful on the other side of the “Golden Gate”.

 

The nose bleed.  The day my grandmother passed was quite a strange one. I woke up as usual and was quite sad that I had to go to work LOL. I went to the bathroom and noticed I had a nose bleed. That was my first sign. I normally get nose bleeds when I am ill, under stress, or something unusual is going to happen. As I got ready to go to work, I felt that something was off. I felt very strange and did not feel well at all. Three hours later, I received a call from my mother that my grandmother had fallen ill and taken to the hospital. We all thought that she was going to be fine and that she would be home in no time at all. My mother went to her side and I stayed behind with my siblings. That evening, we got a call that my grandmother had slipped into a coma. The doctors gave us very little hope that she would come back from this state. As I went to sleep that night, I could not understand why this had happened to such a great person and such an inspiration in my life. My grandmother came to me that night. She looked so beautiful and young . She was so happy and radiant. She told me: “Look, look how long my hair is. I feel great. I am so happy”. The next day, we were told the dreadful news that she had passed. I would never forget that night when she came to me to comfort and tell me how well she felt.

 

My guardian angel.  Everyone has difficult times when they are a teen. I was a very depressed child. I had many traumatic experiences as a child and a teen. Like any other young person, I wanted to fit in and make friends. I had just moved back from the Dominican Republic, and I was under a lot of stress. I had some difficulties adjusting to a new culture and the way of live here in America. I also had a lot of problems with family at this time in my life. One morning, I was in between the state of being asleep and awake. I remember being very stressed in this dream, almost feeling like I was running away from something or someone. I felt agitated and out of breath. When I finally started to completely open my eyes, I noticed a white figure sitting next to me on the bed. The figure was so bright and grand. What happened next, occurred quite suddenly and it shocked me. I felt the figure move very quickly and it flew right through me, leving me breathless. It was as if the figure noticed that I was waking up and I was not supposed to see it.. I was not scared by it, or felt like it was a bad entity. I actually thought that it was my guardian angel protecting me and reassuring me that everything was going to be alright. I feel as though he or she noticed I was awakening and it did not want to scare me. I have never experienced anything like this since that time.

 

The Voice.  A few years ago I was going through a religious battle. I was constantly being asked to joined different churches and to attend religious meetings. I was born a Catholic and going through this period in my life was quite difficult. I did not want to attend church or believe in anything. I was confused about which religion would fit me best or which one was the “correct one”. I was invited to attend a non-denominational Christian church. I was very hesitant, as I was not sure if I would fit in, or if my beliefs would match the beliefs of this church. As the date for the meeting grew nearer, the less I wanted to attend. I was apprehensive. I remember going to sleep the day before and praying to God to advice me. I remember thinking:”What am I going to wear?” As I was getting ready to wake up, I heard the voice of a man in my ear. It was not any voice that I recognized or knew. The voice said:”God does not care what clothes you wear”. When I heard that, I jumped out of bed terrified. I thought who could be in my room speaking to me as I am sleeping?  I did go to that church meeting. However, I learned something very valuable that day. I learned that it really does not matter which religion I decide to become a part of , or if my beliefs seem weird to some people. What matters is that I have faith in God. God will accept me no matter what I wear inside or out.

 

Grandpa.  My grandfather is quite a difficult man. At 83 years old he has every right to be. He has lived through The Civil Rights Movement, The Hippie Movement, The Reagan Years, JFK’s Camelot, The Bush Dynasty, The Clinton Era, and now a new historical political time: The Obamas. My grandfather and I are very close. Under that cold, strict , quiet, and reserved persona of his…him and I are like one person.  A few weeks ago I was going through some difficult emotional times with my family. I did not sleep very well for weeks and was very stressed. Then, I had a dream where grandpa was not only in it but he was advising me. He held my hand and comforted me. He looked at me and told me: “talk to me, it will be o.k.”. The next day I woke up with such an urge to call him, I could barely contain myself. I could not wait another minute. The second I heard his voice, this peacefulness came over me. I felt so much better about everything that was going on. He made me laugh, he laughed for a bit, we vented to one another, and as I said goodbye to him he told me: ” Don’t worry, it will be o.k.”.

 

The Child.  The last dream is more of a prophecy. My husband and I have been married for three and half years. We do not have any children. We would like to have some later on in our lives. However, I often dream of being in a church with a child. Once I had a dream it was a baby girl and in another there was a little boy. In each of those dreams, it seems as if I am getting ready to baptise my child. I seem happy and at peace. Maybe one day this dream will come true 🙂

 

What are some of your dreams? 

As always, comments and advice is welcomed!!!! 

 

Happy Reading!!!

 

***Image obtained from: http://dreamstudies.org/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/full_moon_dreams.jpg

 

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La Lagartija: My very own Inception


How ironic is it that the movie Inception happens to be one of my favorites? I have watched it over three times and I cannot get over how fascinating this movie is. The concept of creating dreams, going through different levels of that dream, to implant an idea in the subconscious sounds impossible; yet so neat.  This movie really makes me think about the kinds of dreams I have had as of late. All of these dreams seem real to me. It is only when I wake up that I realize that I was somewhere else besides my body. I do  feel like I was “traveling” to these realms.

There I was laying in bed about three days ago. Of course, I could not sleep as usual. I watched T.V. till 2 A.M. Still I could not fall asleep. This has been my nightmare for the past few years or so. I finally shut the T.V. off, and stared at the ceiling, as my husband continued to move around the bed, kicking, scratching and hitting me in the face with his hands…What was he dreaming about??? LOL

Anyway, there I was laying in the dark. I decided to try to meditate and no let my mind wander. I don’t remember falling asleep. All of a sudden I was in a jungle. I was sitting on a rock. The leaves of all the trees were neon and forest green. The leaves of the trees were so big and bright. The ground was moist and dark brown, almost like chocolate pudding. There were no flowers, no people, no swamps; just me sitting on a rock staring at a pair of hands. I did not see whose hands they were. The were floating freely without an owner. The hands were holding a small bright green reptile. In the Dominican Republic we called them “Lagartijas”.  I tried to pet the small reptile and the little creature started to bite my index finger. I could not feel pain, I only saw it unraveling the skin around my finger. It was as if he was peeling it off and the skin was continuously peeling off and disappearing. I got up from the rock and decided to get away. I wound up in an open space behind a very large grayish rock. There I saw people. They all had cream-colored suits on and most of them were men. One of them approached me and told me in an abrupt tone of voice: “You cannot be here, you must leave now”. I started to run but found myself blocked by another large rock with a symbol imprinted on it. The symbol was a spiral and it reminded me of the reptile as it was peeling off the skin off my finger. I started to panick, as I was trying to get away and could not climb this rock. This is when I started to fly. I felt my body lift up, and at the same time my body was not struggling to balance. I felt myself light as a feather, just tumbling with the wind. Feeling the breeze in my face and the fresh clean air, I smiled.  Then I closed my eyes and I woke up.

Until my next travels….

Happy Reading!!!

**Image obtained from: http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://la-lagartija.com/wp-content/plugins/random-image/Lagartija-17815.jpg&imgrefurl=http://la-lagartija.com/2010/09/17/hello-world/&h=768&w=1024&sz=520&tbnid=nfcIb-X44S2QTM:&tbnh=94&tbnw=125&prev=/search%3Fq%3Dlagartija%26tbm%3Disch%26tbo%3Du&zoom=1&q=lagartija&docid=5j1zJyVXtawE4M&hl=en&sa=X&ei=w9o2Tp2INM2_tgf3-PyjDQ&ved=0CBoQ9QEwAA&dur=134

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My Cousin’s Smile


Well it seems as if my mind is on a roll. These past few weeks I have been having vivid dreams about my grandmother who passed away, and last night I had a dream about my deceased cousin J. I am not sure if it’s because of all the changes my life is going through with me turning 30 soon, or perhaps I do have a gift. Whatever it is, it has not been the first time and thus I want to document these dreams to see if there are any patterns.

My cousin J passed away about two years ago from Lou Gehrig’s disease. He was much older than me, as he was my second cousin. I remember him being a very quiet man who loved adventures and especially planes. He was obsessed with them and even managed to become a mechanic for a commercial airline. We were not as close as you may think. I lived in the Dominican Republic, while he lived here with his parents and then his own family. But he knew who I was and I knew who he was.

As a child, I remember visiting from the Dominican Republic with my grandfather and he would take me to visit his brother. My cousin J happened to be my grandfather’s nephew. He had a room in his father’s basement filled with plastic airplanes and posters with pilots and plane models. Later on, he came to visit my mother when I was finally living here, and managed to take family pictures of us. It seemed he had taken on a new past time. My mother would constantly say how she loved her cousin J. She loved him because they always got along so well and she always felt at ease with him. She never felt judged or any type of rivalry with him.

As the years went on, we learned that he had this devastating disease. We managed to visit him a few times at the hospital, but only his beautiful radiant smile was left, after this disease had completely devastated his body. I will always remember that smile and those animated eyes. It was almost as if he could speak to you with his eyes. The last time I saw him at the nursing home, after years of living with this disease, he gave me that beautiful smile and looked at me as if he was proud that he was able to see me all grown up. The image of him smiling at me from his bed never left me.

The first time I saw him in one of my dreams, he came to me in the middle of a storm. I was running from something and the sky was pure gray. He just appeared out of nowhere. He had black leather pants on, a black jacket, and he was ridding a motorcycle. I just remember looking at him in amazement as I could not belive what I was seeing. I asked him if he was o.k. and gave me that radiant smile. He started to do jumps and tricks on the motorcycle. He then told me “Look! Look what I can do!”. We both started to laugh uncontrollably of joy and amazement. I was so happy to see him smile, laugh and ride that motorcycle; especially after years of being so sick.

Last night, he came to me again in my dream. I was at my old house, once more. This time the entire family was preparing for a family reunion. I could see how stressed everyone was and J’s sisters were in the kitchen trying to prepare different meals for the event. I was also in the kitchen trying to comprehend what was going on and where I was . J suddenly appeared in the kitchen with that radiant smile and those brown eyes as if they could scream from happiness. I just looked at him and said “Hey! What are you doing here? You look great!”. He just kept looking at me and did not answer. I then realized that he had passed away and part of me got a little scared, I must admit. I then said to him “J aren’t you dead? Aren’t you supposed to be dead?” He never answered and continued to smile at me with his pearly white teeth and his majestic stare. I woke up.

It seems as though these visitors that come in my dream know I am dreaming, but I don’t. Then there are times where I realize that I am dreaming and I question why they are there. I am not sure if maybe my soul travels to another dimension as I sleep and I am able to see and speak to my deceased loved ones. All I know is that seeing them gives me comfort and it gives me so much joy to see them so happy wherever their souls may be.

May all of our loved ones rest in peace!

Happy Reading!!!

*Image taken from: http://www.thegadgetblog.net/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/ap_southwest_plane_070913_ms.jpg

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Conversations with my late grandmother


Last night. Another dream.

This time my old house where I grew up was burning and collapsing in the flames. The world was coming to an end. People were rioting and screaming. The screaming was loud and excruciating. There were so many people trying to get into my house.

My old house was very big. Like most Caribbean homes, it was made of cement, bricks and blocks. I can still smell the cement mix when the men were building this work of art: Two balconies, four bedrooms, glass doors, and a terrace. My grandfather spent his entire youth cleaning commercial buildings to build this house.

Oddly enough, in my dream people were climbing towards one of the balcony of the house. My grandmother suddenly appeared, as I was running towards the glass door that led toward one of the balconies. She just looked at me with her green eyes and brown short hair. She looked so peaceful and calm. The world was ending in my dream. My entire existence was collapsing. Not grandma. She was more present than ever.

She kept smiling at me and said to me: “So, baby. Don’t tell me you used to jump out the balcony and escape in the middle of the night”. I just stared at her in shock. I am not sure how she found out or knew that. But yes! I must admit, there were a few times I escaped the house in the middle of the night to go clubbing, and I would not come home till early morning. I never told her and after all this time I thought I had gotten away with it. There was nothing she did not know about me.  We bonded from the time I was born and she took ownership of me. She would constantly say: “She is mine!”.

My grandmother still takes care of me. That is what I believe. We still have an unbreakable bond.

Happy Reading!

*Image:  http://mi9.com/uploads/fantasy/923/surprise-visitors_1280x1024_13366.jpg

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After Life Experience?


Most people do not remember their dreams when they sleep, although they are a part of our lives.  It is almost as if at night we recycle our thoughts and everything we lived throughout the day is projected in our dreams. I happen to remember most of my dreams. Some of my dreams become reality for me. Dreams are a strange experience and yet a very magical experience for me. I’ve had the pleasure to meet people and live through experiences in dreams, only to then experience them again in reality.

Last night, as I often do, I dreamed of my late grandmother. She was the very best. As most grandmothers, she was kind, giving, caring, motherly and warm.

My dream began with a very unpleasant feeling of pain. I get extremely painful leg pains at times which hinder my walking abilities. I literally I have to sit from the pain. No one has ever told me why I get them. But in my dream,  I was back at my old school which I attended as a child. Everything was the same. The nuns were there, the ivory walls, the gardens with tiny tress covered in red star-like flowers. The bigness of the building still felt the same, and all of the school girls were walking around as if time never passed.

In that dream I could not get up and go up a flight of stairs due to the excruciating pain I was feeling. There was a strange man I have never met before trying to aid me. He seemed from a Middle Eastern descent. He was tall, handsome, and had very dark eyes. As I was kneeling and avoiding his help, he began to tell me how happy he was with his wife and family, how he was even more delighted that he was marrying for the second time. I felt a strange and scary feeling inside as he was telling me this. Was he really thinking of marrying another woman, after telling me he was happy with his current wife? Or was he trying to tell me that I was going to be his wife, and I was conveniently ill with leg cramps as he was telling me this? Was he a man in Heaven and finally being happy in a plural marriage? Does religion not matter in Heaven? I do not have the answers to these questions, and I am a pretty open-minded person and accepting of all cultures and religions. I also come from a very diverse background with customs most people would not understand. I am not sure why I felt this way in the dream or why he had told me this, but it definitely raised some questions in me. It also did not feel odd that he was openly telling me this, I was just scared that he was so open in confiding in me.

As the dream progressed, I managed to get up and walk around the gardens of my school. I happened to cath a glimpse of an older woman with short hair, strolling around one of the pathways of the gardens. I screamed and yelled “Grandma, Grandma, Grandma!!!” Alas! She did not hear me and continued walking in a hurry. I only got to see her from the back, but I was very sure it was my grandmother trying to visit me in one my dreams. Perhaps she had to leave in hurry so that she would not get caught by the heaven police?

After that, I saw my mother trying to find me. It seemed as though she was trying to pick me up from school. This was strange as my mother never picked me up at school when I was living with my grandmother.  I ran towards one of the hallways of the school and I ended up in a beach. The beach was full of people running, walking, laughing and eating. I suddenly encountered a young girl with long dark hair, fair skin and medium built. She seemed like an average girl. She was so warm and friendly. She started to talk to me and escorted me to another hallway full of glass walls. The floor of this hallway was all sand and beautiful rocks of all colors and sizes. I remember the rocks being so black but shiny and colorful at the same time. She held my hand and spoke to me words I cannot remember, and then I woke up.

This is only one of the many dreams I have had where I encountered my grandmother or strange people I’ve never met. There are times when I see her talking to me and smiling. There are other times when she leaves and I cannot accompany her for some odd reason. Whether it is my active imagination or not, my dreams give me comfort when in reality I miss her terribly. I especially miss her smell, hugs and her constant cheering. Not matter what I did, she was always so proud and encouraging.

I truly hope to see her again some day and we can walk those gardens and the beach together.

Happy Reading!!!

Images were obtained from sleepzine.com and English-Online.at

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