Opal Siren

My life in dreams

Let the games begin !!!

on June 2, 2011

Well, here we go. This is my first blog ever. So, be patient as I get used to this new world. I have never had a blog, but always wanted one. I waited so long for the right time, the right topic, the right background theme….and lets just say I was turning gray while waiting! I am turning the big 30 this year, and it is time that I stop waiting and start playing the game of life.

If you asked me what this blog is about, I have no clue. As the matter of fact, I haven’t had a clue for some time now. I haven’t had a clue about my goals, what I like, aspirations, dreams, etc. Could it be that I am just here to be here? Who am I? What am I going to do with the rest of my life ? Where, and how did it get to this point ? Why do I feel like failure ?

All these questions I have pondered on for the last 29 years, but I have never attempted to answered them. I am sure that I am not the only one with these thoughts and there have been many books written about the same questions. Now, I want to answer these questions on my own, and try to not be afraid what the answers may be. Who knows, I may find through this process that I am a mystical creature from children’s fairytale books, who hunts children down and takes their souls LOL. The even bigger question for me is: what does the word “accomplishment” mean for me?

I was about 9 yrs. old when the question of what I wanted to be when I grew up  first came into question. I was a rather small, skinny child, just walking around the halls of an all girls school in the Dominican Republic, when one of my friends asked: “Arlene, what are you going to be when you grow up?” Naturally, I answered: “I am going to be an actress”. In reality, I had no clue. All I cared about then was playing with my Barbies, making believe I was a singer in front of a mirror, and trying on my grandmother’s clothes from 1965. I said the first thing that came to my head. I knew whatever I said to her, It had to be something that impressed her. After all, she was going to be an Engineer.

I really did not think of the time I was put on a stage at the age of 6 for a school play, and I started to cry because I was scared of being so high up on that stage. Or the time my grandmother made me sing in front of family and I wanted to throw up. Still, I wanted to be an actress, and a singer, and a fashion designer, and, and….

Yet, today I felt very unaccomplished. I did not make it as an actress like I wanted, or any of the other careers I wanted. Then, my best friend called me and gave me something to think about. She has been with me since my late teens, and we are soul sisters. She said, “you have accomplished everything you wanted, you are not seeing it because it did not realize itself the way you wanted !!! “. Then, she urged me to cross it off my list. Could it be that I have accomplished a lot, and  I just been focusing so much on what I did not have, or the negative side of things, that the real accomplishments were staring me in the face and I could not see them???  Plus, I did not have a list to check off !!! Well here are a few of my ignored accomplishments :

  1. Acting: I acted in most school plays at my school in the Dominican Republic, as well as a few plays in college and community theater.
  2. Singing: I wrote songs back in my teens and I was featured on a CD in college. The singing was terrible by the way LOL.
  3. College: I graduated Summa Cum Laude from college while working full time.
  4. I lived on my own for a while. YES! I supported and lived alone while attending college.
  5. I had many jobs. I worked at many places and even was in Banking for a while.
  6. Got married. I found a great guy that loves to serve his country, after years of dating the wrong guys!!!
  7. I have my siblings, many parents, a great husband, and my best friend, who are there for me each time I have one of these moments.
  8. Writing: I am writing this blog.
  9. Travel: I have been to Dom. Rep., Puerto Rico, Bahamas, Mexico, VA, NY, NJ, PA, FL, N.C., S.C., CA, AZ, IL, MD, GA, etc.

I have to say, after all this, I will be blogging about my experiences with my family, friends, and my own life experiences. I hope to go on this journey of self discovery. I hope it will help others, and that I can gain insight from other’s comments.  What is your accomplishment ???

Happy Reading!!!!

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One response to “Let the games begin !!!

  1. michael says:

    there are many things in life that go unseen or unsaid, but you must remember that with every passing day comes a new goal. With this new goal comes a new challange. I am sure that you will always reach every goal that you set because you have a great support system at home.

    we love you
    your husband and carrot

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